…and I just want a million dollars!

I will give 10 cool points to the person who can tell me what AMAZING television show and which episode that line comes from.  You can earn a bonus 15 cool points if you can tell me the episode the “cool points” come from! [Kelly, I will be disappointed if you don't get this because I think of you as the tv trivia goddess!!]

What I mean by the title is that while whining about the huge photoshop books I have to try to read was super-productive in my last post, I decided to try a different approach.  I actually went onto the world wide web, maybe you’ve heard of it?, and I looked up photography classes in my hometown.  Shockingly enough there are some!  Duh!  Why do I think this stuff is rocket science?  Probably because photo*shop has more bells and whistles than any instrument I ever used in a chemistry or physics lab:)  I am really excited to see how far I can go with my little obsession hobby.  

I’m trying not to pat myself on the back too much, but I think I’ve been making some really good progress on taking pictures that I like lately.  Notice I did not say “good” photos, but photos that I like and at this stage that’s all that matters because no one’s paying me to take pictures they like!  I’m hoping a little tutoring from a pro can help me take things up a notch.  My dad keeps telling me I have lighting problems, but that does not actually solve the problems, it just points them out.  I think he’s just a little bitter because I got a sweet deal on a giant Nikkon camera a few months ago and a) it’s bigger than his camera, and b) I’ve betrayed my Canon-loving family by embracing the other side.  Jokes on me because I really bought myself out of being able to share lenses, but as I said it was an amazing buy!

I digress!  We made it back home safe and sound and it’s been a chaotic week trying to get things back under control at work.  As always my staff is great and they had no problems without me, but the administrative stuff has been a bit excessive the last few weeks and we’ve been having computer troubles on top of that!  Here’s hoping tomorrow is the end of that because I’m not going to be pleasant if I have to look at that “trying to connect to the server” error message every 2 minutes again next week:)

Luckily Chloe’s preschool started a new unit for June and it is on water.  I cannot tell you how much the pumpkin LOVES water!  It just makes me smile how unbelievably excited she gets when she sees any little puddle or raindrop.  She did not make it home in her cute skirt on Tuesday afternoon because she had found some mud puddles to jump in during outside play time.  Maybe I can help encourage her to turn her love of water into a career defending the integrity of the Clean Water Act?  Maybe not, but I sure would love it!  

The only tricky thing about the water unit is that they now have water play day one day a week.  No problem, right?  Well we’re supposed to bring a swim suit to leave there or remember to bring one every week (not going to happen, I know my limitations!)  I tried to buy her a cheapy at wally last night, but they had nothing in her size with the mermaid on it, which is what she wanted at the time and what they did have were kind of skimpy bikinis for a 2-yr-old so we tried tarjay.  Found some cute mermaid suits, but guess what was hanging next to them?  Thomas swim trunks!  She loves that silly train so much she already has a blanket and sheet at day car with him on it.  I am trying not to force her into gender roles, but swim trunks do not come with shirts, nor did they have even a semi-matching shirt to be found in her size.  So to make myself feel like people would know it was her idea not mine to get swim trunks I also had to buy a hot pink and black swim shirt and bottoms from the girl’s rack to wear with it.  

Why do I care what people at day care think of what she wears to swim day?  I don’t know, it’s an issue probably left over from childhood or something.  I didn’t see her in the trunks, but I’m sure she was still the cutest little swimmer around even if people were a little confused about which boy’s trunks Chloe had stolen:)

We had an exhausting evening and now my tiny girl is sleeping next to me on the couch.  I can’t bring myself to move her yet because she looks too dang cute!  It’s funny how you can kind of see how busy our day was by the look on her face when she’s sleeping.  She’s worn out tonight!

Wow that was long for me!  I’m going to sign off with one of my favorite pics from our photo tour of the bridges last week.  I haven’t done the editing I want, but I love this one just like it is!

The sky was absolutely fabulous that day, which gave a beautiful blue background to the red bridges, but the bright sun led to some squinting and half-closed eyes, too, so it was challenging.  I don’t know what Harry was doing for sure, but he was a real trooper on our tour!  I miss all of you guys already!!!

Ok, I’ll just add one or two of the tiny attitude I referred to before so you might get an idea of what I’m talking about…

Chillin’-

 

I’m busy driving here mother-

 

I’m outta here!

And here’s the sweetness that almost always follows the fiesty!  Love this!!!

 

How many people do you know who can pull off this outfit without looking at least a little trashy?!  Yep, that’s a metallic silver peace sign!  LOVE. THIS. GIRL.

Fun in the northland

We have been having a great summer vacation in Minnesota since last Thursday night.  The little darings are getting along surprisingly well, and that is making it a really great visit.  I love this age that Chloe is dragging me through right now, but I can’t help but things like travel, vacations, staying away from home, etc. will be a lot easier in just a year or two.  If you have any evidence to the contrary, please don’t burst my bubble right now… a mom can dream, can’t she:)  

My camera hobby may be turning into something of an obsession.  We went to the mall to play on the toys last night and Harry smiled at me and then asked, “Hey, where’s your camera, Al?”  He and Chloe had a great time playing and I really wish I had proof of that!  I have a grand idea for a side photography business that eventually turns into my retirement gig (I’ve even named my business-yep, I’m a dork!) and I’m going to feed that crazy dream by stopping in Madison Coutny, Iowa on our way back home this weekend.  I cried through the wonderful Bridges of Madison County twice in the movie theatre and I rarely make it to watch a movie outside of my own home so that is saying a lot.  I am now going to get my chance to shoot the bridges and I am hope, hope, hoping that the kids will cooperate and give me a little time and even a few smiles while we’re there!  I’m kicking myself that I did not bring my new camera that I’ve been afraid to take out of the box. It is way too much camera for me at this point, but it would have been great to break it in this weekend on such a great location shoot!  Oh well!!  

I’m a little impressed with my photograpy on this first pic.  I don’t know what this effect is called, but I saw it on Pioneer Woman’s photo blog and I love it, and am pretty proud that I already have my own example of it.  I love that my mom is blurry in the background, but you can tell she’s watching Jack and smiling.  If anyone knows the name of it please share so I can look like a real photographer when I talk about this!!

We had fun with bubbles on day one of our visit…

Grace really had fun!

Chloe did some work on the shed my dad was helping my sister and her husband build.

This tea party picture was completely staged and the party lasted about 3.5 minutes.  We just wanted a picture of all 4 of them together, but I guess that was too much to ask!

Since Chloe has not been out of arms reach of my mom this whole vacation Jack and I have had a little bonding time…doesn’t it look like he’s having a blast?!

Harry is also loving our bonding time:)  I just love this kid so much!!!

He doesn’t always love my camera, though!!  I’ll keep working on him because this beautiful face is meant for close-ups!

Gorgeous (with attitude)

Was someone looking for the sweetest face in the world?!  I think you found it!

The thing I love best about this picture is that she’s snuggling my knee here…

Seriously Mom, I’m tired of this bow…

This weekend I discovered the secret to really cute pictures of Chloe.  Are you ready for this?!  Take pictures of someone or something else.  That’s it.  So simple!  Why didn’t I think of it sooner???  This is Chloe at her cousin’s birthday party when she realized I was trying to take pics of all the guests…

And here she is at the baby shower we had for my friend on Sunday…

We had a fun and busy weekend last weekend and this coming week is going to be even more of the same!!  Tomorrow we’re heading back to visit my sister up North!  It’s going to be a great, but full 10 days together, which we haven’t had in at least 5 years:( so I can’t wait!  There will certainly be cute pictures to follow.  

My blog is getting even less dedicated to thoughtful entries and even more heavily weighted to pictures, but I’m just not sure how to fix that.  I haven’t been able to put my feelings into words let alone into writing for months now.  I think it goes back to the answer my law school professors loved to use when someone asked them to define something lovely like “due diligence” or “adequate consideration”…it’s like beauty, you just know it when you see it.  Unfortunately you can’t write that into a legal brief and you can’t write it into a blog entry!!  I look at Chloe and I know what I’m feeling, but trying to explain it to anyone is pretty close to impossible.  I’ll keep trying periodically, but at least I’ve almost been able to get my thought process into black and white–even if it’s just explaining why my thought process isn’t leading to anything these days.  Any words of wisdom about how to get through this fuzziness are warmly welcomed!  

Still working on my new photo editing software, but haven’t made much progress on it.  I wish I could just take a class on it so I didn’t have to read through all these books to figure out how to use it all!  I’m not much for studying any more.  Glad I went to law school straight from undergrad because I don’t think I’m ever going to regain that momentum even though I’d love to have a PhD to tack onto my name!

Cousins

 

Chloe and Harry

 

baby jay's

Jack

get out Harry!

Ok, that’s a bunch of pictures with no explanation!  It’s late so I’m going to try to keep this short.  These are some of my new favorite pictures from our trip to visit my sister and nephews after Easter.  I’m showing them to you now as the “before” versions because I just installed Photo*Shop on my computer and can’t wait to figure out how to use it!  As soon as I get some good “afters” I’ll let you see them.  I have a bunch more of Chloe from our trip to play on the toys at the mall, but I want to do a comparison with pics of her on the same toys just a few months ago over labor day to show you how she’s growing up way too fast!  I don’t want to rush through that one.  The last picture of Chloe by herself is a priceless face that anyone who spends much time with Chloe will observe and probably receive, too!!  She is very fond of calling the shots and when there’s another child around challenging her authority it takes a while for her to decide if she’s going to go along with it or not.  Luckily in this case she did and just hopped and danced down the paths at this little zoo/wildlife center and enjoyed her freedom from the stroller.  I’m mostly impressed with myself for capturing one of her many “looks”!

Everyone stay healthy!!!

Just figuring out how to add videos…

Picture updates

 

Had to say goodbye til next season after the sweet 16, but it was a great year!

I’ve been negligent toward the blog, but life is hectic and I have very few readers so I’m not too worried about it.  Here are some pictures of the pumpkin over the past month or so…

 

 

I made this lovely tutu! Go ahead, it's ok to be impressed!!

 

Can't pull this girl away from a mirror-can you blame her??

 

Nothing like a little snow 2 weeks after spring break!

Missed it again!

March 2008

This is a picture I took in March last year of Chloe holding her referral picture.  Our referralversary is actually on February 8th, but I missed it again this year.  Luckily my friend Laura is more on top of things than I am and she remembers.  I have also started missing our monthly Mama and Chloe anniversaries, which indicates a couple of things to me.  

First, I have stopped counting my life and Chloe’s in one-month increments.  Seems strange, but I think it’s an encouraging sign that things are going well and I’m not looking at life in those “survival” terms like I had to last year.  Each month we conquered together last year was one month closer to Chloe being done with night terrors, getting caught up on her nutrition, getting caught up on her physical development, getting caught up on her verbal development, and the two of us being one month further in our attachment journey.  We’ve been working more on reading books, singing songs, playing with toys, and generally hanging out like two best friends enjoying the good life together!  

 

one year later-still not looking at the camera

 

Second, while I’m relieved that I feel like I’ve moved out of survival mode and into enjoyment mode, it stresses me out a little bit.  I’m afraid I’m getting lax already on things I should really be paying attention to.  I should be doing more to uphold all the little mini-traditions I intended to start with Chloe.  You can’t just start up a tradition again after ignoring it for a year can you?  Oh well, Chloe’s staying with my parents tonight so as usual I’m spending my alone time worrying about what I’m doing wrong in my role as a mother!  Don’t worry, it wasn’t all this cheery tonight.  I made it to four different places I needed to run errands to in record time and have everything marked off my list for the week!  I’ve talked to the Princess already today and she doesn’t really seem to be missing me because she’s having too much fun with Grandma!

 

One more of my silly girl!

I could get used to this weather!

We are ready for spring, too bad the colors this weekend didn’t look much like spring!  Maybe I’ll play with some editing and try to at least boost the color.  I’m getting tired of all the brown grass and leaves.  The weather was very nice but windy  on Saturday so we pretended it was fall without our coats on and played in the leaves!

Grace wanted to pose with her favorite Big Leaf!  We had such a great morning!

Here is Chloe taking pictures of me with a rock.  

That’s about all I can do for tonight.  I feel like it’s going to be a really long week and it’s barely started.

Happy Valentine’s Day

With this sweet little valentine I had one of the best V-day’s I’ve had in a long time.  Nothing exciting, but as you can see Chloe was in an entertaining mood so I laughed a lot.  My little baby is growing up.  This weekend at Grandma and Grandpa’s she started drinking coffee!

Ok, it’s really chocolate soy milk, but she was so proud of herself and so excited about it I couldn’t take that joy away from her.  She was as always very dramatic about it and kept going with it all weekend.  She’s amazing and I can’t think of any new ways to say that so I’ll sign off with one more picture.

Grandma’s Birthday

My family had a get together this weekend to celebrate my Grandma’s birthday.  She is such a wonderful woman and is and has always been such a positive supportive force in all of our lives.  As always we had a great time.  Chloe loves being at my parents’ house so much.  I love it too, because they almost always give me at least one morning of sleeping in, and usually two!  Tomorrow night I have to attempt bedtime at a reasonable hour again because Chloe was up late again tonight and that’s not a great combo after a long weekend with too much excitement and not enough sleep.  My cousin had a great idea to create a scrapbook for Grandma with letters from her kids and grandkids telling her what she means to us, thanking her for the beautiful person she is, and sharing memories that we all have of her.  We had a great time finishing up the scrapbooking part of it late Saturday night and the great part is that my best friend came over to check on us and offer a little moral support when we still weren’t finished at 2 a.m.!  

I love looking at old family pictures.  We have done a lot of that lately because my dad has a new photo scanner that he is putting to good use.  It is amazing to see and hear the stories of all of the family members and try to keep the family tree straight in my head.  It makes me sad to think about how different this type of experience might be for Chloe some day.  She will have a million family pictures to look through and she will be in 97% of those pics because she is so darn photogenic and incredibly fond of the camera.  What she won’t have is the possibility of looking through old pictures and finding a shot of grandma when she was 3 looking exactly like her.  Grandma looks like her cousin Grace, not Chloe.  Maybe Chloe will not be the worrier that I am, maybe she won’t be as insecure either.  Maybe I’m raising the first child in the history of the world to be completely comfortable in her own skin and self-assured enough to not need to find those type of answers?  Maybe not.  Maybe, despite how amazingly happy-go-lucky she is at age 2, she will be your average teenager and young adult with questions about who she is and how she fits into the world.  Maybe on top of all of that she’ll wonder why she is where she is, who she came from, how she got here, and why it had to happen to her.  Maybe she’ll try to second-guess the decisions that were made for her by a bunch of adults that she didn’t know.  Maybe.  Maybe for her those questions will be impossible to answer.  That’s not fair.  That’s the part that makes me sad for her.

Who ever said life was fair?  That’s a favorite quote from a very wise friend of my mom’s who I really miss.  It’s not fair for any of us, at some point we all have to realize that.  No one’s life is “perfect” but there are people who have figured out the secret of being perfectly happy.  I’m not necessarily one of those people, but I have a tremendous amount of happiness in my life.  I just usually find a way to balance out the happy with a hefty dose of worry.  I wish I could leave out that second part, but no luck yet!  I hope Chloe is better at this than I am.  I’m not sure how to teach her to look at life in a more realistic light than I sometimes do, but I’m really trying.  We’ll see how it goes…

I haven’t really proofed this post, just kind of getting some thoughts out of my head so I can get to sleep.  Here are some of the cute pics we took this weekend at the birthday party!